Heartfelt pain

Our little tour of South-East Asia brought us to the holiday town and any golfer's paradise of Kota Kinabalu. Dad picked us up from the airport where I found out that there was not only one, but two terminals. The first one only had six gates if I remember correctly so I was very surprised to find out that there was a second terminal.

On the drive back, I asked about Ranger, dad's dog, only to be told that he had passed away last year. I sat there and absorbed this without saying anything and left it in the darkest corner of my mind. It was only when I got home much later that night that it truly hit me. Speaking to Chris about it brought back all the things about Ranger that I hadn't thought about in years. I took for granted that everytime I came to visit, he'd be there. Now he's not and it hurts.

Ranger was the only one I went through the whole training process with. In fact, I distinctly remember giving him lots of showers and getting extremely wet in the process. I don't even shower Curly! That's Edeline's job. :P Of course, there were all the other times when I sneakily brought him snacks and half of whatever I was eating when dad wasn't there. There were a few times where I got caught which brought down a hell of a tongue-lashing from dad. They all circled around the topic of how I shouldn't spoil dogs like that since it'll make them difficult to train and blah blah blah. *rolls the eyes* Didn't stop me though. ;) I still went out and bought Ranger bacon bits among other things.

It's funny how I'm not upset with the fact that no one told me about his death. I'm not even angry with anyone about it. My greatest regret is that I never spent enough time with him. He was such a playful pup; such a beautiful, affable little sweetheart. Everytime I came back he was so excited to see me, so happy to just be with me. Oh sweet Goddess, I miss him so much! I thought I was all cried out after the hours I spent yesterday but it hurts to know that I didn't get to see him one last time...